Managing Renovation Stress and Overwhelm
I recently met with Jess from Happy Beams Interiors for an Instagram Live to discuss a subject I’m very passionate about: How to Manage Stress & Overwhelm During a Renovation. Jess wanted to get my perspective from a renovator’s view point and of course we both had our interior designer hats on too. For those of you that missed it, or prefer to read, the following few minutes will detail the key actions you can take with your project. There’s the addition of some extra points that came to mind after our chat too. It’s an honest blog, but I sincerely hope it helps you feel less stressed so you can enjoy the experience.
Find Your Why
This is a phrase that’s thrown around when you’re embarking on any personal challenge, perhaps it’s starting a business, running a marathon, a lifestyle change or renovating your home. I have a crystal-clear reason for choosing to go through another wild ride renovation: I have a disability, it causes a lot of discomfort and adaptations to my lifestyle, therefore I crave comfort, ease, and calm. Bigger than this, something I’ve not shared before is that this is our forever home, and we want to have a family here. I won’t feel safe carrying children up and down a flight of stairs, so our bungalow suits us perfectly and was chosen with the demands of children in mind, our whole layout enables a safe family life (we hope). I’m prepared to renovate, because I know how it's going to feel living a different life in Alpine, this makes the lows of renovating more tolerable and the highs even more victorious as we make traction to be one step closer. Spend time identifying your why, you’ll need that determination when the romance of dominos deliveries and wearing dungarees has worn off (P.S. the movies are lying, it’s very different in reality).
Design a Home That Meets Your Needs
With the above in mind, it’s a worthwhile exercise to outline what you really need from your home. Get to know your project before making any significant or costly changes, if you discover what you really love, and find out what creates frustration, you’ll be able to start identifying what you truly need. For example, do you really need a free space in front of a window for a fir tree once a year? Do you really need a fourth bedroom? Do you really need a walk-in pantry? Or are these all just nice to have? On a side note, and to illustrate how personal your project should be, we’re not having a walk-in pantry at Alpine because at the end of the day I often struggle to stand up to cook and therefore don’t want to have to walk backwards and forwards fetching ingredients, therefore food storage is beside the worktop and cooker. We’re also choosing not to have a bar stool dining area at our island and instead lowering the seating so I can sit to chop veg and pass to Lee to cook, so I’ll be comfortable and we’ll both be involved. Meet your basic essential needs in your planning phase, then look for ways to add your desirables through flexible room function and furniture. For example a snug that doubles up as a guest bedroom could be a use of space that you get to enjoy all year round rather than having an empty room waiting for guests to stay. I can’t stress enough that this is your home, for your needs and your lifestyle.
Design a Home That Suits Your Style
A reminder here that research shows that our environment impacts emotion, mood, confidence, productivity, relationships, and boy do I know it! Designing a home with intended emotion involved can really contribute to your wellbeing, if you connect the dots of how you want to feel and what evokes that emotion you’ll be off to a good start with your design. At times we can be overwhelmed with options, so in my blog How to Start Designing Your Home I’ve shared advice to get started with planning your project. Once you start to shape your vision, commit to what you consistently love, i.e. don’t choose a green kitchen just because it looked good in someone else's home, who may or may not adore green because of the way that colour makes them think of growth, nature, and hope of new horizons, (sorry I got carried away there). Instead choose the colours, light, patterns, and textures that translate for you. It takes effort to work out what you really love as we’re bombarded with ideas and inspiration for our interiors, if you’re on Instagram you can’t escape it and some people feel the pressure to have a home that follows trends, quirks and is always changing. I’ve seen homes undergo re-decorating of the same room several times a year, generating content, but heart breaking when we think of sustainability. Give your time, and investment, to getting it right and doing it well and you’ll have a home that lasts (trust me, as a serial renovator who’s gone back-to-back, it’s tiring doing this again and again!) A note here that often renovators choose to paint everywhere white and then pick a paint colour at a later date, however when you’ve gone through months of renovating it’s hard to pick up the tools and do a job again. Not only this but we quickly get used to our surroundings. Therefore, I always recommend, despite decision fatigue, to select your paint colours at the time of decorating. If you’re a neutral fan I’ve written a blog post with my favourite flexible hues; Using Neutral Paint Colours.
Plan, Plan and Plan
Preparation makes your project experience more successful. Not only do you need to know the big picture, but you also need to iron out the small details before you begin. For instance, a sliding barn door isn’t an afterthought, it requires adjustment to the construction of a stud wall, it requires accurate measurements for practicality (is there enough width to fix the rail and allow the door to slide fully open) and thought to furniture, for example if you use a wall to mount a door how does this impact where you put the furniture? Another common example is the addition of a shower niche, it’s not a small detail at the end of the bathroom project, it requires planning when building the walls, choosing the size and shape of the tiles, deciding the tile layout and direction. I’ve seen examples of shower niches that aren’t big enough for the height of the toiletries, these are the details that form part of planning and impact the overall result. If you’re well planned, you’ll be in a knowledgeable position to inform tradespeople and you’ll have time to react positively to any hiccups that need your attention during the project.
Keep Momentum
We’re almost twelve months into the work at Alpine, our previous renovation was around 22 months, however as durations go this isn’t a particularly long time in the renovation community. We’ve been through many versions of living with temporary bedrooms, lounges and kitchens which all seem fun for the first few days but quickly become tiresome when you need to go into four rooms to make a slice of toast! Living with clothes in bags, having reduced options for cooking, spending evenings hoovering dust and using the gym to shower can add extra strain to your daily life, consequently it’s really important to practice gratitude. I remind myself that for some people they don’t have a roof over their head or know where their next meal will come from, so whilst our circumstances might not be that easy, renovating is a choice we’ve made and we’re lucky to be on this venture.
Part of my daily routine includes journaling and visualisation. Through journaling I reflect on what I’m grateful for. After walking in all weathers to the gym every day for three wintery months to have a shower, I remain so grateful for our compact guest en suite. As things develop my gratitude increases, sometimes the smallest things can mean so much. Visualisation is a strategy I’ve discussed in the blog Visualisation as a Renovation Tool, but ultimately I spend a few minutes every day picturing our life in our finished home, I describe the weather, the sounds, smells, what I’m doing and how I feel. You can try my free journal download to document your renovation visualisation process, how amazing will it be to save these and look back in the future?! You could even print them with photos into a scrapbook.
Follow a Process
Having a system and process is another strategy to maintain momentum. By detailing your design in a spreadsheet, understanding the construction timeline, and having good communication with the professionals involved, you can create a system that mobilises your project step by step. People will tell you “Rome wasn’t built in a day”. Of course, they’re right, but it’s really frustrating when you’re living in chaos. However, it’s important to take your time making plans, refining decisions, and organising the process. It pays off to keep track of every part of the project. I’ve shared more support on budgeting in the blog Tips for Planning and Budgeting and a handy free spreadsheet can be downloaded and edited to suit your renovation.
Ask the Questions
Almost as a final and very simple strategy to remain informed and keep overwhelm at bay is to ask all the questions, note down every question you have and ask the experts. Is this possible? What would it mean if...? What will happen next? What do you need to know from me before you do that? Can you explain the implications of that change? Where would you recommend I look for X,Y,Z? Please can you give me your advice on...? You are not expected to hold all of the answers, therefore lean on the architect, interior designer, builder, plumber, tiler, carpenter, etc etc. They do their job to get you the best results and if you have an easy way of communicating these queries it will stop them from becoming worries.
Take Your Time
Lastly patience is something I surprise myself with, but I believe this is rooted in a belief that it will be worth it, so if all else fails, remind yourself of your why and know that good things come to those who wait. If you find yourself in a fluster, and need a renovation mentor, for a small monthly investment you can join the Renovation Room Membership and I will be in your back pocket with answers to your questions, savings through trade discounts, and design guides and tutorials. If you need a little more help, I’m all ears, please drop me an email and let me know what you need. I live and breathe renovating....let’s do this!